Crab Battle? CRAB BATTLE? (post follows).
Page: 1
Panel 1
An old man in traditional “Japanese” clothing (red, kinda “crab” ish looking in color/pattern/design?) is sitting on a rock , someplace outdoors, green and wet, on a bright sunny day. He is sitting with what appears to be his lunch….a rice cake.
Narrative Box: Once upon a time, long ago, there lived a “crabby” old man who lived in a marsh.
Dialogue (Off Panel): Hey, mister!
Panel 2
An over-the-shoulder view from the old man’s perspective (his back is to us and perhaps in silhouette.). There is a young man in front of him a short distance away. He has brown, short cut hair, bright, dark eyes, and a sort of playful look to his face. His clothing (also “Japanese”) in general should also reflect a somewhat “cool” yet “playful” side to him?
Old man (crab): Yes?
Young man (ape): Sir, please, will you trade me this seed for your rice cake?
Panel 3
CU of Crab. He appears to be thinking, stroking his chin with a spindly, wrinkled old hand of his.
Crab: Why should I?
Ape: Because I haven’t had anything to eat for a while.
Panel 4
A silhouetted shot of both Ape and Crab. Ape appears, although while not bowing, his posture suggests he is trying to show some degree of respect+humility towards the old man.
Ape: Please, mister, I beg of you!
Crab: Well…alright.
Panel 5
CU of Ape. He seems rather pleased with himself, grinning ear to ear rather cheekily, turning away from the old man. (who we can see over his shoulder although he is not very important in this panel).
Ape: Wow, that was WAY too easy! Heh!
Page 2
Panel 1
A wide shot of the old man walking into his garden from the back of his house, which is a little sparse, but what he does have is green and growing just fine…
Narrative box: When the crab got home, he planted the seed in his garden.
Panel 2
That old looking hand of Crab planting the seed in the ground.
Panel 3
The old man sitting on one side of the panel (perhaps on his porch or on yet another rock/stump), smoking a pipe (A Japanese pipe- called a “kiseru”), watching his garden. There is a little sproutling there.
N. Box: Time slipped by….
Panel 4
Same angle. The only difference is now there is a seedling tree in place of the sprout. Maybe also vary the season/time of day/weather to show the passing of time.
Panel 5
Same shot+ vary the season/time of day/weather again. The seedling has grown off panel into a great tree.
NB: And the seed grew into a big tree.
Page 3
Panel 1
Top down shot. The old man is looking up at his tree with great delight, at also the ripe looking orange fruit (technically, FYI- Persimmons) hanging from its branches. The young man (Ape) is also in this shot, looking upwards with great surprise as well.
Ape (Thought Balloon): Wow, that’s a lot of fruit!
Panel 2
CU on Ape. He appears to be thinking, looking off to the side.
Ape: Hmmmm…..
Panel 3
Full body shots of both Ape and Crab. Ape is talking to the old man, negotiating with him, while Crab looks at least receptive of what Ape has to say.
Ape: Sir, let me pick your fruit for you.
Crab: Well, I was going to do it, young man….
Ape: A man of your humble age shouldn’t be climbing trees!
Panel 4
Another shot of Ape/Crab.
Crab: Well….I suppose you may be right….
Ape: So, yes?
Crab: Okay.
Panel 5
Crab watches as Ape “anticipates his jump”
Panel 6
Same shot. Crab is there, but Ape is gone, leaving only leaves to flutter down behind him.
Page 4
Panel 1
Ape, now deep in the tree, reaches for one of the many numerous fruit.
Ape: Oh, this is great!
Panel 2
Ape eats a fruit.
Panel 3
Ape starts to quickly pick the others.
Panel 4
Back down on the ground, the Crab looks up (at the tree, which is off panel)
Crab: How goes it up there?
Panel 5
The crab gets hit in the head with a fruit.
Panel 6
A fruit…which is overripe and rotten.
Page 6
Panel 1
The old man continues to get pelted with over-ripe fruit.
Ape: Sure, sure! Eat up! There are some great fruit up here!
Panel 2
The barrage of fruit stops.
Panel 3
Top down view. Ape from his viewpoint in the tree, his pockets full of fruit, looks down at the old man down on the ground.
Crab: Are you done yet?
Panel 4
CU on Ape’s head/face. He’s still staring at the Crab (off screen), and looks a little confused.
Crab (Off-panel): Can you come down here please? Head first? I’d like to talk to you.
Panel 5
A look up the tree at Ape (who is wayyyy up in the tree)
Ape: Well…okay, sure!
Panel 6
Same angle. Ape starts to climb down the tree.
Page 7
Panel 1
CU of Ape’s pocket, where fruit is beginning to move.
Panel 2
CU of Ape’s face. He notices something.
Panel 3
Fruit starts to fall out of Ape’s pocket, and there’s nothing he can do except look in surprise.
Panel 4
Over the shoulder view from Ape (in silhouette) to the ground. The fruit falls to the ground, where the Crab is scrambling around to pick it up.
Panel 5
The old man, his hands full of fruit, runs off….
Panel 6
And jumps down into a hole.
Page 8
Panel 1
Ape, confused, and a bit angry, watches from up in the tree.
Ape (Thought Balloon): Well, fine then! He wants to make trouble of this, then…
Panel 2
Ape jumps further into the tree branches. We cannot see him, it is implied by rustling leaves.
Ape (Thought Balloon): I’ll show him!
Panel 3
A shot of this hole.
Panel 4
Same shot of the hole. It’s getting darker.
Panel 5
Same shot of the hole. It’s dark now.
Panel 6
Same shot, only this time, we see the old man pulling himself (with his fruit) out of the hole.
Crab: I’m getting too old for this….but…
Panel 7
Over the shoulder view. The old man is brushing himself off. There is a dark ominous figure above and behind him (Ape, technically)
Crab: At least I have my fruit.
Page 9
Panel 1
A dramatic shot of the Ape decking the Crab in the face with his foot, falling to the ground. Fruit flies everywhere. Speed lines. And so forth.
Panel 2
The old man is down on the ground, and Ape is foreground in the shot, his back to us. He continues to kick the old man.
Ape: That’ll teach you to play tricks!
Panel 3
Crab is a heap on the ground. Ape is walking away.
Panel 4
A shot from over the shoulder of two other blacked out figures at the scene of Ape walking away from the Crab. One is large, the other is lanky.
Lanky Guy: Now that just wasn’t fair, was it?
Large Guy: Hrmm. No.
Page 10
Panel 1
Narrative Box: Having fully drubbed up the poor Crab, Ape decided to go home….
A wide shot of a dimly lit, Japanese style house. Ape can be seen in silhouette from behind one of the sliding doors.
Panel 2
Ape slides open one of the doors.
Ape (thought): Man, that was too easy again!
Panel 3
Ape crouches down in front of a hearth, his back to the camera.
Panel 4
He starts to light it…but notice in the ashes, at least the reader can notice…there’s an egg there.
Panel 5
The egg bursts.
Panel 6
Hitting Ape in the face. He reacts in pain.
Page 11
Panel 1
Ape is howling in pain, confused, holding his head in his hands that has just gotten spattered with hot egg.
Panel 2
Ape gets decked in said face by a punch.
Off panel dialogue: Trick’s on you, bud!
Panel 3
Ape lands on the ground.
Panel 4
Ape looks up, frightened. Dark shadows are well…overshadowing him.
Panel 5
Over the shoulder shot from Ape. There are the two guys we had seen earlier, looking down at Ape, angry. One large, one lanky, both tough looking and looking rather angry and ready to beat Ape up.
Narrative Box: Needless to say, what goes around, comes around.
Panel 6
A dark panel.
Dialogue (no balloon, only italic white text scattered about the panel): Ow!
I’m sorry!
You’d better be sorry, beating up on an old man like that!
Narrative Text: Don’t beat up or trick your elders. Respect them and everyone will look fairly upon you.
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